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Tuesday, 14 September 2010

A history of Taxi driving AND tweeting down through the ages. Lush eh?




Dear dribbling reader, I’m going to take you back…way back, through the mists of time, a journey of total pointlessness, but nevertheless an unnecessarily under dramatized account of my life as a cab driver in the past.

Twitter is a recent phenomenon that has somewhat replaced the diary, so I have included excerpts from my actual hand written diaries, I wrote them on actual paper that apparently comes from trees. So as my Twitter type scribblings are now fashionable again, this is a badly written attempt to enlighten. So, before you read from the very bowels of my diaries here are some facts...

The licensed taxi trade is the oldest form of regulated public transport system in the world. In 1636 Charles the first issued the very first proclamation for 50 hackney carriages, in 1654 Cromwell set up the fellowship of master hackney carriages by act of parliament and taxi driving became a profession.

At the beginning of the 19th century, the first lighter two wheeled “cabs” came over from France. The name comes from the French meaning “jump like a goat“ because they bounced all over the place! (Bit like mine then!)

The hackney carriage term comes from the word “hacquenee” and was a French term used for a work horse, it literally means ambling nag!

Wilhelm Bruhn invented the taximeter in 1891, and to the dislike of taxi drivers who’s wages became regulated (are your wages regulated?) he was thrown into a river by drivers.

Hackney carriage drivers on long journeys did it in “stages” also picking people up at designated points along the way, as this part of the trade grew they became omnibuses and then into the bus transport systems we have today.



And 325 years later along came little old me! I wrote these into my diary long before Twitter and blogs came into our lives…

-1654- That Cromwell is trying to get us blokes licensed to pick people up! Ha! That'll never work!  This "tweet" isn’t real by the way, only Samuel Pepys was doing ye olde twitter  back then…


-1979- Bloke tried to pay me with empty beer bottles! made him go into the off sales of the pub to get the money on them to pay me.

-1979- That Mrs Thatcher seems alright, what's the worst that can happen? She will probably paint number tens door pink but that’s about it…


-1982- I found glitter make up, a laddered stocking, and a little bottle of Brut, men! They are worse than women these days…

-1986- Might treat myself and get me one of them velour track suits, might surprise the Mrs and get her a matching one...

-1987- A little yuppy bloke got in with one of them new mobile phones, he couldn't  even lift the battery onto his lap!

-1988- Blokes got the hump because my cassette deck has munched his mix tape, just pulling out the last mile of tape from it now…

-1989- I'm liking my new wooden ball seat cover, I know! I know! I'm a little show off!

-1990- Lady in back sprayed hair lacquer over her hair, glad I didn’t have a fag on, would have been blown to bits...

-1990- Found a Snickers chocolate bar in the back, whatever that is? Anyhoo! It tastes like a marathon…


Right! I’m off to get on my ambling nag and bounce off down the road like a jumping goat and earn some legally capped regulated money! Oh! And Thanks, Charles I, Cromwell, AND Charles II thanks a lot…

Until next time…