Well, there you go. ‘Free
from cancer.’ Three words you want to hear from an Oncologist. I am
contemplating having them tattooed on my arse in Verdana size 16 font.
A little over a year ago, I
went through the invasive but necessary tests to determine whether the cancer
has returned to eat more bits I need to enable me to function normally. The all-important
news, the results of said invasive probing, incredibly took another WHOLE year
for an appointment to tell me.
So, it’s been five years since
being told I had bowel cancer and subsequent surgery, on tenterhooks since then,
not knowing if it’s come back, not wanting to know, avoiding strenuous exercise
or anything that will get the heart rate up. Scared in the irrational belief
that those bastard little cancer cells will wizz faster around my battered
insides and attach themselves to the bits I need the most.
From the moment, I asked ‘How
bad?’ the original answer of ‘About nine months without drastic surgery’ put me
in a life stasis. Immediately ambition, wants and plans went on hold, time
stood still and did for five years or so. Now I’m a bit like an old locomotive
rusted to the tracks, with my three new words that may or may not end up on my
arse (going off the idea already, I’m so fickle) I’m creaking forward slowly
hissing my way to whatever lay before me. Finally.
Cockier than ever it
seems, I’m certainly pissing people off. The all clear has made me more of a
cheeky fucker than normal; I’ve even recently picked a fight with a little
bloke and give my astonishingly supportive wife a lot of lip. My cockney is
reasserting itself like never before. Frankly, and apparently I no longer give
a flying fuck.
Is there a parable playing
out here?
Maybe that cheeky
teenager, the abrupt old man or woman with the fuck you persona you met today
had a ‘life on hold’ term of stasis recently. Give them a bit of slack, maybe
they are finding their place in the world once again. Believe that they are
actually glad to be alive and are enjoying one of life’s greatest pleasures.
Letting YOU know they are here having stepped out of the shadow of death.
The joy of pissing people
off?
Dee-lic-ious.
